Questions are our minds’ crowbars and shovels and pickaxes. They afford us the leverage to make sense of another person’s priorities, the project or strategy or problem. With the right mindset, they’re tools to pry open a hidden agenda or uncover a roadblock or reveal gold.
With the wrong mindset, however, they can cause the opposite effect, putting people on the defensive, closing down discussion and delaying or even sabotaging critical initiatives. Even the most brilliantly conceived technologies — or questions — can be used as weapons instead of useful tools.
So the next time you’re about to begin an interview or a meeting with one of your direct reports or a conference call with colleagues from another area of the business take a few moments (or minutes) and focus on your state. Ask yourself: “Am I ready to meet this person on her terms and understand her issues or am I only focused on my interests and my agenda?”
Is your purpose as a leader to create a clearing for others and build something of value or are you merely there to demonstrate your intellect and ‘power’ and shut down discussion?